Why Start an Adoption Ministry?

In 1998 I founded Heartbeat Infertility & Adoption Ministry – a Christian
support network for infertile couples and pre-adoptive families – at University
Presbyterian Church in Seattle. Since its inception, over 160 families and professional resource people
have participated in the all-volunteer ministry. Over the years, the ministry has
provided written materials, educational workshops, one-on-one mentoring and
support groups. We have established ministry partnerships with some local
churches, and we’ve helped several churches throughout the US start similar ministries.

People often ask how
God led me to minister to infertile couples and adoptive families. When
my husband and I were newlyweds, we mapped out a master plan for our lives. We
wanted to establish our careers, travel, buy a car and a house. We figured that
after five years, we’d be ready to have children.

Little did we know that God
had a very different plan in store for us. After the allotted five years had
passed, we began trying to conceive a child. Four years later, after numerous
visits to fertility specialists, we still had no idea why we were unable to
conceive.

During the time we were trying to get pregnant, my husband
and I were high school teachers. Teenagers are not the most tactful people in
the world. Our students constantly barraged me with questions like, “When are
you going to have a baby? Don’t you like children? You’ll look so cute when
you’re pregnant.”

We didn’t exactly feel comfortable sharing our struggle to
get pregnant with our students, and it was also difficult to talk about it
among family, friends, and even at church. It was a lonely time in our lives. During
that time, God began to show us some other options. Several of our close
friends had recently adopted children, and as they all spoke very highly of
adoption. After much prayer and discussion, we decided to forego medical
intervention and to pursue adoption.

The adoption process brought with it a new set of anxieties.
Now, instead of doctors, drugs, and high-tech medical procedures determining
whether or not we would become parents, our future rested in the hands of
social workers, attorneys and judges. Most disconcerting, the ultimate power
rested in the hands of the birth parents who would decide whether they thought
we were fit to parent their child. We felt totally out of control for the first
time in our lives. All we could do was to place the future of our family in
God’s hands. And that’s exactly what He wanted us to do.

A week after we completed our adoption paperwork, our
caseworker told us that a young couple had chosen us to adopt their baby, who
was due in a few weeks. They wanted to meet us. A few days later, we met a
hesitant, yet determined couple. Four days after that, our son Ben was born,
and that young couple made the hardest decision of their lives by entrusting us
to parent him. The moment of their greatest grief was the happiest moment of
our lives.

Two
years later, we decided to adopt a second baby. This time, the road wasn’t so
smooth. In the course of one year, four potential adoptions failed. During the
time I grieved for those four much-anticipated babies, the Lord once again
reminded me to let Him take control. Amidst the turmoil, I felt a sense of
peace and an assurance that God would work things out according to His plan.
Sure enough, He did. We were blessed with our son Joshua when he was two days
old.

God used our struggle to develop in me a sensitivity to the
needs of others who are experiencing infertility or considering adoption. I
felt a strong call to start a ministry for infertile couples and adoptive
families. When I shared this dream with my pastor, he encouraged me to go for
it.

Three adoptive moms from my church met for lunch at my
house, discussed the direction that such a ministry could take, and Heartbeat
Ministry was born.

My next few entries will provide you with specifics
about Heartbeat Ministry and will equip you with information you can use to
start your own adoption and/or infertility ministry.